Nobody tells you how quiet life gets after moving alone.

At first, it’s thrilling, new city, fresh start, endless possibilities. But then, reality kicks in. You realize you don’t have your usual crew to grab dinner with. No last-minute coffee runs with a friend. No casual “Hey, what are you up to?” texts that actually turn into plans.

And suddenly, the excitement? It fades a little.

I’ve been there. And let me tell you, it’s going to kick your ass. Homesickness sneaks up on you like a song you didn’t realize was playing in the background. It’s not just about missing people; it’s about missing the version of yourself that felt comfortable.

But here’s the good news: it gets better. You don’t have to stay stuck in the isolation phase. It takes effort, but before you know it, your new city starts feeling like home.

1. Accept That Loneliness Is Part of the Process

I fought it at first. I told myself, You made this choice, suck it up! But that only made it worse. The truth is, moving somewhere new is a huge change, and loneliness? It’s just part of the adjustment.

Instead of ignoring it, I started leaning into it. I acknowledged that feeling lonely didn’t mean I had made a mistake. Once I stopped beating myself up over it, I could actually focus on doing something about it.

2. Get Out of the House (Even When You Don’t Feel Like It)

When you don’t know many people in a new city, it’s easy to fall into a routine of going to work (or working from home), coming back, and spending way too much time binging Netflix. The isolation feeds itself.

I had to force myself out, even when I felt awkward, even when I had no set plans. I’d explore different neighborhoods just to get familiar with my surroundings. I would get in my car and make random turns. No set destination, I got lost on purpose just to get to know my surroundings. Even walking around a park made me feel less like I was stuck inside my own head.

You won’t magically meet people overnight, but getting out helps you feel connected to the world again.

3. Say “Yes” More (Even When It Feels Weird)

Making friends as an adult is awkward, no doubt about it. But I learned quickly that if I wanted to build a social life, I had to say yes to things.

A coworker invites you to a group happy hour? Go.
A neighbor mentions a community event? Show up.
You see a local class or meetup that kind of interests you? Try it.

The first few times, I felt like an outsider crashing someone else’s plans. But eventually, those random “yeses” led to real friendships. You have to put yourself in situations where connections can happen.

4. Call Home, but Don’t Live There

Homesickness is tricky. Calling family and old friends helps, but if you spend too much time living in nostalgia, it can make the loneliness feel worse.

I found a balance. I set up regular Zoom calls, sent Snapchat videos, or just a quick call but I made a rule: for every hour I spent talking to people back home, I had to do something in my new city. It forced me to stay present, instead of just longing for the past.

5. Build a Routine That Feels Good

The hardest part about moving somewhere new is that your old life had structure, your favorite coffee shop, your go-to gym, your weekend plans. Now? Everything feels unstructured and uncertain.

I had to create a new routine. I picked a regular grocery store, found a restaurant I enjoyed, and made a point to hike as much as possible. The more structure I had, the less my days felt like they were just floating by.

6. Find “Your People” (It Takes Time, But It Happens)

At first, I tried to make friends fast or used dating apps. I wanted instant connections, a new “home” friend group. But friendships don’t happen overnight. The best ones take time to build.

Instead of rushing, I focused on finding my people, the ones who shared my interests, my energy, my humor. I joined a hiking group (big win), started going on the same walk everyday, and even tried a “Singles Group” on Facebook (okay, that one wasn’t for me, but I tried).

Eventually, the people I kept crossing paths with? They became my people.

Final Thoughts: It Gets Better (Seriously, It Does)

Moving alone comes with a season of loneliness, but that season doesn’t last forever. The key is to keep moving forward, meeting people, exploring, building a life that feels good.

And one day, without even realizing it, you’ll look around and think, “Wow. This place actually feels like home.”

Because it will.